- Anti-Porn and Anti-Prostitution Writer, Speaker and Activist
- AntiPornography.org Volunteer
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Scroll down for a VIDEO on this topic
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I used to be in the "adult entertainment" industry. I did over 50 porn scenes, danced at strip clubs, and dabbled in "escorting" -- AKA prostitution. As someone working in the sex industry, I heard from countless young girls asking me how to get in the business and how to be "successful" in porn. Now that I am finally out of this business and seeing it for what it is, I ask why? Why do so many girls these days aspire to have sex on camera, or dance naked in the laps of strange men? What happened?
One only has to look back to the 90's and 80's to see how things have changed (and not for the better). Back then, women (and most men, for that matter), got into porn out of desperation. The majority of people in the sex industry fell into the business and did it secretly, hoping that they could just make some quick money and get out. Now, girls actually look at "adult entertainment" as a viable career option.
This is dangerous and incredibly misguided. Young women should be aspiring to something real, something that will take them somewhere in life. Porn is often nothing but a dead end.
Here is the pattern I have seen over and over again in my 7 years in this industry: Girl gets into porn, shoots regularly for about 6 months to a year doing relatively tame sex scenes. Work starts to slow down, so girl decides to do more hardcore scenes (things like anal, multiple men etc.). Work slows down again. Girl now starts escorting and becomes "open" to doing just about anything on camera to get work. Eventually, there is no company willing to shoot her and porn work is dried up. Girl usually has no work history and often no schooling, and now is essentially stuck with escorting, stripping, webcamming and any porn work she might be able to scrape up.
Now the girl has a black mark on her reputation forever and no matter what else she does in life, there are videos all over the Internet of her engaging in various sexual acts. She can never take it back or hide it. All she can do is hope that future employers, potential mates and others never see it or are very understanding about her past. (And even those who are understanding still look at her differently. You can never unring that bell.) This cycle usually only takes 2-3 years. That is not a career, and it's nothing to look up to or hope for.
I'm not saying to ban porn, or demonize the people in it, but this is not something so many young girls should want to do. There is something fundamentally wrong when you have young women thinking that having sex for money is glamorous or fun. This is not the message our society should be sending out.
Society seems to accept porn, but the truth is, once you're known as "that girl that did porn", people will never quite look at you the same way. They will never have the respect for you that you deserve and crave. Young women need to be taught to value themselves and their bodies, not that "hooking up" is no big deal and that porn is just another path to fame and fortune.
I wish that I had aspired to more, dreamed of something bigger. Now I have to deal with my past for the rest of my life. We need to get THAT message out, that porn leads nowhere, that sex is something you shouldn't just give away to anyone and everyone.
I only hope that my stories and experiences can help someone think carefully before making a decision that can alter their life and ruin many future opportunities. Please understand that porn is not a legitimate career path. If you're lucky, you'll get a couple of years before you're "shot out" and used up. And chances are, you won't have much to show for it.
Aspire to something real, something that will truly fulfill you, not porn or prostitution.
Please feel free to read more of my writing about my life and my years in the sex industry, as well as my writing about the overall harms of pornography, prostitution, stripping, and related issues. Click HERE.
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AntiPornography.org Note: Thanks for telling it like it is, Vanessa! We really appreciate you sharing the harsh truth about working in the porn industry, and we hope that many girls and young women will read your story, take it to heart, and choose a better life for themselves. All young women deserve more than the exploitative dead-end of the sex industry, in which they will usually be treated as disposable objects with no humanity, like plastic sex dolls, to just brutally use until broken and then throw away like a piece of unwanted trash. We hope that young women will learn from your experiences and wise words of advice, so that they don't have to learn the hard way themselves!
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DESCRIPTION
Pornland: How Porn Has Hijacked Our Sexualitytakes an unflinching look at today’s porn industry: the stories woven into the images, the impact on our culture, the effects on us as men and women, the business machine that creates and markets porn, and the growing legitimacy of porn in mainstream media. Above all, PORNLAND examines the way porn shapes and limits sexual imaginations and behaviors.
Although we are surrounded by pornographic images, many people are not aware of just how cruel and violent the industry is today. PORNLANDshows how today’s porn is strikingly different from yesterday’s Playboy and Penthouse magazines — how competition in the industry and consumer desensitization have pushed porn toward hard core extremes. And, with the advent of the internet and other digital technologies, users don’t have to wander far to access porn; todaythe average age of first viewing is about 11 for boys, and studies reveal that young men, who consume more porn than ever before, have difficulty forming healthy relationships.
PORNLAND also looks at how our porn culture affects the way women and girls think about their bodies, their sexuality and their relationships. PORNLAND: How Porn has Hijacked our Sexuality argues that rather than sexually liberating or empowering us, porn offers us a plasticized, formulaic, generic version of sex that is boring, lacking in creativity and disconnected from emotion and intimacy.
CLICK PICTURES ABOVE TO ORDER "PORNLAND" AT AMAZON.COM NOW
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For more information about the documented harms of pornography please visit the extremely informative websitePornography Harms at PornHarms.com.
"Dedicated to providing the most accurate peer-reviewed research on the harm from pornography, along with relevant news and opinion."
This outstanding website comprehensively addresses the harms of pornography in regards to all of the following categories: addiction, brain science, children, cybersex, family, Internet, Internet safety, marriage, men, psychological, prostitution, relationships, research, self image, sex trafficking, sexting, sexual violence, societal, STDs, teens, and women.
Have you taken the NO-PORN PLEDGE at NoPornPledge.com yet? If not, now would be a really great time to do so! Please click here or the banner below.
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See the list of many people from all around the world who have signed the No-Porn Pledge. Click here.
Read the reasons why they have signed in the No-PornPledge Guestbook. Click here. Don't forget to join them by signing the pledge and sharing your reasons why in the guestbook there as well!
From NoPornPledge.com:
"Join a growing number of people who have made a decision to eliminate porn from their lives. Sign your name, and publicly declare that you won't use porn, or have an intimate relationship with anyone who does."
At AntiPornography.orgwe are working to prevent and combat the devastating harms of pornography, prostitution, sex trafficking and sexual slavery, as well as all other forms of sexual exploitation, through public education and advocacy. We are:
Pro-Education, Pro Safe, Healthy, Respectful, Equality-Based Sexuality
Pro-reasonable regulation of the pornography industry for the health and safety of the performers.
*Please see FAQ for more information on all of the above. Thank you!
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RESOURCES, FRIENDS, SUPPORTERS AND ALLIES:
NOTE: All those marked with * are friends, subscribers or followers of AntiPornography.org at Facebook, YouTube, Twitter, or one of our other social networking websites, or have demonstrated support for our work otherwise, such as providing content for this website or linking to us or to one of our blogs and/or social networking projects. Also please note that the below list is a work in progress and that it is not complete. Please share any errors, omissions or suggestions here. Thank you!
WOMEN AND GIRLS FOCUSED RESOURCES:
(For family, children, men and addiction focused resources, please scroll down.)
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ANTI-PORNOGRAPHY ORGANIZATIONS GROUPS AND WEBSITES:
Saavi Accountability -- The only online accountability program that works with all online addictions. It is also the only program that sends notifications instantly via text message to an accountability partner so that they can be supportive when an individual needs it the most at the point of weakness, while they are accessing the online content. The software was created by a young man (26) who overcame his addiction and is trying to help others.
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ADDICTION MESSAGE BOARDS & DISCUSSION FORUMS FOR HELP & SUPPORT:
NOTE: There are MANY anti-porn and porn addiciton discussion groups and pages at Facebook.
Just search GROUPS and PAGES for "porn addiction", "pornography addiction", "sex addiction", "anti-porn," "antiporn," "anti-pornography" & "antipornography"
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For more than 50 personal stories documenting the harms of compulsive and/or excessive pornography use and/or pornography addiction please see our "Porn Harm Stories" page. Thank you.
(Note: The No Porn Northampton FAQ is in the bottom half of their sidebar. In addition to the usual questions about pornography it addresses questions and concerns about activism against sexually oriented businesses such as "adult bookstores.")
Shared Hope International specifically focuses on fighting the demand for commercial sexual exploitaiton, including addressing pornography as a very significant demand factor for sex trafficking.
"Pornography is a marketing device for sex trafficking: It normalizes degradation and violence as acceptable and even inevitable parts of sex, and uses the bodies of real women and children as objects. The difference between pornography and erotica is clear in the roots of the words themselves -- porne means females slaves, eros means love -- so pornography, like rape, is about violence and domination, not sex. Millions of lives depend on our ability to separate pornography from erotica, and to disentangle violence from sexuality."
Gloria Steinem, 2006
For information about Gloria Steinem's important work of fighting against the harms of pornography, sex trafficking and other forms of sexual exploitation and abuse, including videos and an audio interview, please see our page on Gloria Steinem. Click here.
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For more information on how pornography fuels prostitution and sex trafficking, please see our page on Pornography and Trafficking. Click here. Thank you!
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- By 
I used to be in the "adult entertainment" industry. I did over 50 porn scenes, danced at strip clubs, and dabbled in "escorting" -- AKA prostitution. 
Now the girl has a black mark on her reputation forever and no matter what else she does in life, there are videos all over the Internet of her engaging in various sexual acts. She can never take it back or hide it. All she can do is hope that future employers, potential mates and others never see it or are very understanding about her past. (And even those who are understanding still look at her differently. You can never unring that bell.) This cycle usually only takes 2-3 years. That is not a career, and it's nothing to look up to or hope for. 
